First off, HURRAH!- having already subjected myself to geographically driven inflation by ending up living in our fair (but pricey!) nations capital, the freeze on alcohol duty comes as a welcome relief to my creaking wallet. No such luck for the smoking fraternity however, as baccy duty rose by 37p a pack. Whilst I recline in my hypocritical delight at such measures, smokers are left to face the tight-chested future once more the poorer.
This is the first budget I've experienced as a tax-payer, having sat through previous editions as any self-respecting economics & politics student would- hungover, on the couch. This change meant two things. Firstly, I was unable to subject myself to watching the live TV coverage of the great event- no watching the Helicopter following the ministerial car from No.11 to the House of Commons like the dullest ever episode of Police, Camera, Action!, no listening to the rhetorical din of George Osborne smugly decimating the country's future like he's reading last weeks shopping list. I don't know why I used to do it- it's torture. Take my word for it, an interest in politics far from precludes the dark, quite possibly arrestable, thoughts that cross one's mind when, ready to resume your life, the Chancellor having taken his seat to bawdy exhortations from his own benches, you see the Shadow Chancellor/Leader of the Opposition rising to launch into a string of poorly written jokes and objectionable soundbites. To know that the next hour of your life is sunk into the same all-encompassing catatonia as the previous- just because 'it's the budget'- is one of those moments that, whilst tragic at the time, must one day come in handy at 'meetings'.
The second difference of my new salaried-ness was that I am now able to enjoy the full delights of budget calculators. Having previously been smashed to the tune of about £7 a year by previous rises in alcohol duty, this year I was able to play properly and find out the true extent of the Chancellor's shenanigans on 'real people' like me. Turns out George's income tax changes have gone and saved me about £190. Bingo! Good budget right?
Spot the tax-cut for the rich...
Well, would have been better had I been what's known as 'filthy rich'. The highest earners were gifted a tax cut on the basis that they weren't bothering to pay the 50p rate. Whilst Osborne grandstanded on his moral objection to tax evasion he effectively gave into it, as the rich, like a bratty child manipulating their parent, got their own way. As Osborne retired having finished his budget he was greeted by a congratulatory slap on the back from his pal Cameron, a slap carrying the gratitude of the country's, now slightly richer, millionaires. By the way, we're all in it together...
Any debate around the above, however, has been somewhat derailed by fuss kicked up around the Granny tax. The hysteria around 'the raid on pensioners' illustrates nicely the yawning failures of the media coverage surrounding the budget. In the weeks leading up to the event the papers are filled with unsubstantiated claims of cuts to this and grants to that, and following the delivery they devolve into concocted attacks and raids by the Chancellor. In the end, the only way that George Osborne gets away with his pretence of trying to help the whole country, and not just the wealthy tribe, is because the media coverage somehow manages to beat him for disingenuous-ness. The budget is a distinctly unsexy event. The media coverage makes it up like a West End tart.
Things I like this week: A list of some of the things I'm enjoying at the moment.
Homeland- Out the loop was what I was. After recommendations from numerous friends I've started catching up on this. Can't stand the titles but apart from that it's pretty good. Intrigued more than Gripped at the moment
Audiobooks- again on the recommendation of friends, I made use of the free trial available at Audible. For me, novels should be read, so I've sought to expand my mind with a bit of history and used my one free credit on the first volume David Renolds' Empire of Liberty. Commuting and learning- the wonders of the iPod.
Real books- Re-reading Sometimes a Great Notionby Ken Kesey, better known for One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. A few books I've loved first time round have succumbed to the sophmore effect and left me a little disappointed. This is not one of them. Superbly crafted characters, explored through a brilliantly innovative narrative technique, placed against the wondrous backdrop of rural Oregon. It's a brilliant book.
The Boss- Is Bruce Springsteen a guilty pleasure? I've got friends who can't stand him, and I kind of get how the stadium rock, working-class sloganeering schtick can grate, but for me he gets away with it cause it all seems pretty genuine. The new album's a fine listen, filled with big tunes, the Okie Springsteen drawl, and some good old leftie tub-thumping
Beyond Civil Partnerships: Last Sunday, the Roman Catholic Church, ever the bastion of impeccable morals, stepped up its embittered crusade against gay marriage. Whilst a letter by two senior Arch-Bishops opposing the notion of guy and guy, girl and girl, tying the knot was read out across the nations Catholic places of worship, John Sentamu did his bit to keep the Church of England on the same retrograde path by wading in with his opposition to the notion on the Andrew Marr show. Whilst the offending parties claimed that such opposition did not represent a form of discrimination, there persistent inference that gay marriage would destabilise society left them wallowing in the fear and bigotry of their own arguments.
Marriage itself is a peculiar institution. It's basically based on the somewhat unfulfilling notion that a relationship requires some kind of material validation, yet manages to provide a somewhat justifiable sense of acceptance and reassurance to religious and non-religious alike. With time it has become as much an institution of the state as the Church- something that wouldn't have happened had the Church not been quite so keen on wielding it's Holy influence in times past. No longer the sole property of the Church, marriage must reflect the kind of society we live in. In a modern, tolerant society, in which each holds the other to be equal, gay marriage should clearly be allowed.
A couple of weeks ago I heard a really interesting point made on a podcast in a discussion about gay marriage. The speaker believed that in 50 years time, those that oppose gay marriage now, will be viewed much the same way those who opposed Civil Rights in the 1950s and 60s are seen. Though the statement was made in an American context, I believe time will play out with the same results over here. As the generations shift and, with it, attitudes change, we are moving inexorably towards the legalisation of gay marriage. This is undeniable in Britain, where all three major parties are in favour of it and with every malign outburst to the contrary, its opponents place themselves on the wrong side of history.
Joy of 6: 6music turned 10 years old this week. I got a Digital Radio in 2004 but only came across 6music a couple of years later. Since then my dial (or the Digital equivalent of a dial) has barely been touched. There've been a few aberrations- George Lamb, the horror!- but overall 6music is a station that opens your ears to any number of artists that you've never come across before, and never would if you spent all your days listening to Radio 1, Absolute and Xfm. Diehards may whinge about the playlists but you can't be listening to Peel sessions from The Fall and Captain Beefheart b-sides all the time. For every overplayed dirge there's many more brilliantly crafted, exquisitely executed tunes, old and new. For now, this gem is getting me out of bed each morning.
Tired old Formula: Now I understand there are people out there that enjoy watching a sport in which the best competitors are provided with the best machines (in my view proper sports don't involve engines) and are then told to race, inducing a spectacle in which the idea of fair competition comes somewhat in line with that found at a Las Vegas casino. I am aware fans of such a sport do exist and they have every right to do so. But... I can not, for one minute, imagine their being enough of them to justify whichever channel that has the rights to broadcast it spending a small East African nations GDP promoting its coverage of it. BBC were guilty of it a couple of years ago when they took over from ITV, and now Sky are promoting their coverage as if they've won the rights to Jesus's coming out party. The whole she-bang kicked off in Melbourne this weekend. Certain things will have me awake at 4.30 in the morning- Formula 1 is not one of them.
You Trots just don't understand: This government may be Conservative by name but they are in fact pretty radical by nature. Less than two years into office and they have already enacted major changes in the Education system, raising fees for Higher Education and Academising much of Secondary. For a good year now they've been battling to alter the form of the NHS whilst they also go about attempting to radically overhaul the Welfare system. The ambition may be admirable, but, for many, the ideas sure as hell aren't as they seek to make life harder for those who don't exactly have it easy at the moment. But raise an opposition voice to this Government and be prepared to be smeared, patronised and ultimately ignored by a group of Ministers who consider it a success to have their breeches only part-dampened as they piss into the wind.
Education illustrates this perfectly. When the tuition fees faff was happening there was no attempt to engage with dissenting voices. Opposition was either labelled as hard-left, Commie activists, or condescendingly told that, despite representing this country's intellectual future, they were too simple to understand the benefits of being saddled with three times more debt than the current system. 'But you'll pay less per month' whinnied Nick Clegg, conveniently obscuring the fact that payments will be lasting much longer. Reforms of Primary and Secondary Education are the same. Oppose them and Michael Gove's on his soapbox calling you a 'Trot'. A concoction of condescension, obfuscation and rudeness seems to be the tonic for the government in the face of opposition.
A Tory 'listening exercise'
In the past week NHS reforms and the Workfare scheme have raised issues for Cameron & co. The majority of the medical profession apparently 'don't understand' the NHS bill and thus were excluded from the minority coalition of the willing that was assembled on Monday. Whilst Lansley might have had a few awkward moments on the way in, I expect the government weren't too bothered with the raving former-Union official that accosted him, as it plays into their narrative of their reforms being opposed by outdated lefties, ignoring the variety of professional bodies also standing against the reforms. As for Workfare, oppose the coldblooded exploitation of the jobless and you're a 'job snob' according to Iain Duncan Smith. Sainsburys, Waterstones and others obviously disagree as they pulled out the wrong-headed coalition scheme. Even Tesco's pulled out...when Tesco show more moral conscience than you, you might want to reassess your plans. But it wouldn't appear so. The government seems intent on continuing to kick the shins of those it fancies, resorting to smears, and an explanation that they just don't realise bruised shins are good for them, when they dare complain.
Inland What-pire?: Went to the BFI last night to watch David Lynch's Inland Empire, as part of their David Lynch season. I had heard (though not seen) of Lynch's work before, and was aware it was pretty weird. However, nothing quite prepared me for this.
The film is three hours of indecipherable rubbish. I enjoyed the odd five minutes, but with the film that long it's like enjoying the odd drop as you're waterboarded. Maybe I just don't get it, but you'd have to be some kind of loony film buff to appreciate whatever was going on on screen. Even the A4 sheet that was meant to introduce you to the film made zero sense. And the worst part...at the end as I roused myself from by brain-ached stupor, people clapped. They clapped. What?
Six Nations Update: Just over half-way in and I'm 7-1 for my predictions. Admittedly I've basically picked the favourite in every match so far, with only a late Welsh penalty in Dublin depriving me of a perfect record. No surprises in the the first or last matches of this weekend. The England-Wales match was great entertainment. England have a promising group of players who could be delivering big things in a couple of years if they can stick together. As for Wales, it's all about the present. Victory against Italy will set up a shot at a Grand Slam against a French side coming off three matches in consecutive weekends. Exciting times for the immense Sam Warburton and his crew.
As for next weekends rearrangement: France over Ireland- I want to pick the Irish as I think they're marginally the better team, but their horrid record in Paris cancels that out. Both teams need to impress next weekend, as England look ready for a scrap in the last two matches.
When the Brits were fun: Some moments from the past, because cutting off a speech because of TV isn't very rock'n'roll.
The obvious
Confusion reigns
They say musics gone downhill
And because I'm a Manics (and Comprehensive School) fanboy, how to deliver an acceptance speech
Reclaiming Responsibility: Don your deerstalker and load up your shotgun. The now annual Banker hunting season is in full swing and not a hefty bonus, nor an errant Knighthood, are safe from the foxhounds of Cameroon opportunism or Milibandian rhetoric.
Bonus-less
On Monday, Stephen Hester, uberboss of RBS at the moment, decided to waive his bonus worth a little under £1m. Now Hester runs RBS right now, when the bank is majority owned by the Government, from whom the money provided in the bailout kept the bank alive. Whilst it would have been nice if Mr Hester had somehow stumbled across his morals in the pocket of one of his briefcases and chosen to decline it voluntarily, the manner of the decision was somewhat brought on through a public haranguing. And quite right to, for the bonus for Chief of a lucky-to-be-alive bank like RBS was clearly absurd. Things aren't quite as bad as they were at the depths at RBS, but the money machine's certainly not pumping out profits like it used to.
Fred Goodwin was uberboss at RBS when the money machine was lubed up and spurting out profits like mass-produced chocolate biscuits. For that, they gave him a Knighthood. Fred Goodwin was also uberboss at RBS when things got uberbad. For that, on Tuesday, they stripped him of his Knighthood.The fall from grace puts him in the good company of Nicola Ceaucescu and Robert Mugabe in having been demoted from Knight of the Realm. Without wanting to draw a comparison between the scale of destruction caused by these three unhappy musketeers acts, there is a parallel in the way that the awards were handed out by an easily impressed, cosy cabal of elites at the top of the British establishment, disconnected from both the troubles and value-system of those commoners in the real world. One could almost say it makes the Honours system appear ridiculous.
Amusingly, both main political parties managed to find themselves straddling the fence on an issue on which there was only one side to be. Labour drew up Hester's Brucie-bonus contract and Knighted Fred the Shred for services to bad nicknames. The situation was basically all their fault. Ed Miliband, however, did a pretty good job of ignoring what he'd been involved in a few years ago and going successfully on the offensive. For the Tories, it provided some good headlines, and whilst some genuinely see the sense in the actions, stripping a rich man of undeserved money clearly still rankles with many enough to provide some petty, whinging column inches for the Daily Telegraph. It is a strange world. Labour, former members of the Royal Society for Bonues and Knighthoods for foxes, and current members, the Tories, both sit smiling while the hounds tear the beasts apart.
Cool Fact of the Week: (Courtesy of Slate's Political Gabfest- well worth a listen, especially this being an election year) President Tyler, 10th President of the United States (1841-45), born 1790, still has grandchildren alive. Best of all, one of them thinks Newt Gringrich is 'a jerk'.
Setting an example: Seems like this was the week for the great and the good (or the deceitful and bigoted) to fall on their swords.
Chris Huhne has always been a careerist egomaniac, happy to trample upon anything in the cause of self-advancement. That seems to include both his marriage and the maxim that you don't lie on matters of a criminal nature. For the Lib Dems Huhne was like a dodgy kitchen appliance that was broken, but not quite faulty enough to get rid of. Finally, this week, it blew up on its own accord as Huhne was charged with perverting the course of justice by trying to pass his speeding points on to his wife. Whilst the Government made all the right noises about being sad to see him go, one senses that on both sides of the coalition the Champagne corks were hitting the door as it closed behind him.
Just an all-round good guy...
And then John Terry. Sir John Terry of Stamford Bridge. Is it possible to find anyone who isn't a Chelsea fan willing to say a good thing about John Terry? To be fair to Chelsea fans, quite a few of them can't stand him as well. Whether it's taunting American tourists at Heathrow in the aftermath of 9/11, carrying on affairs with teammates girlfriends, or racially abusing fellow professionals, Terry has always done his best to uphold the highest levels of coarseness, degradation and ignominy. This week facing a criminal charge of using racist language, and the terrifying prospect of the FA's justice system (in what othe profession could you make such overtly racist comments and keep your job?) he was this week stripped of the England captaincy. I fully believe in innocence until proven guilty but John Terry puts forward a good case for the opposite.
In related news, Harry Redknapp's tax evasion trial is drawing to a close.. What a wonderfully high moral standard the high-achievers of our society exhibit...
Six Nations Picks: Made before the weekends games
Final Table:
1. Ireland
2. England
3. Wales
4. France
5. Scotland
6. Italy
This weeks games:
England over Scotland: First the history. England haven't won north of the border since 2004. Scotland haven't scored a try against England at Murrayfield since 2004. If Scotland can keep it tight they could edge a kicking contest, but I fancy the new England crew, without the baggage of players of old, to put on a bit of a show and take a 10-15 point victory.
France over Italy: I know Italy won this fixture last year and that the plucky Romans keep improving but at the Stade de France I can't see anything other than a Gallic victory.
Ireland over Wales: Ireland will be out for revenge after their quarter-final defeat in the World Cup. A glance at the Heineken Cup quarter finals would suggest that Ireland have the strongest pool of talent to choose from at the moment, and I expect that to play out over the course of this Championships.
Made after the weekends games
So... were it not for a couple of questionable decisions by Wayne Barnes in the last 15 minutes of a match that brought the Six Nations to light, I'd be a perfect 3-0 after the first weekend. Bradley Davis deserved a red card, and even with a yellow he deserved to cost Wales the game through a moment of brute idiocy. It's a credit to the rest of the Welsh players that they kept at it, dragged themselves back into the game with a 14-man try, before, in a moment of cruel irony, Barnes gave them a penalty for a rather innocuous tackle on the returned Davis. As for Ireland, with eight minutes to go and a penalty just inside their own half against 14-men they should have kicked to touch. Sexton's speculative effort took time off the clock, but provided the Welsh team with a brief rest period instead of knocking them further on to the back foot. If he makes the kick fair play, but in the circumstances the option more likely to lead them to victory was to bury Wales deep inside their own 22.
Anyhoo, on to next weeks picks:
England over Italy: So the English didn't exactly impress the way I though they might at Murrayfield but they ground out the win. After a solid defensive performance, the Italian challenge should allow them to get a good workout on the offensive side of the ball and move to two wins out of two.
France over Ireland: Can't say we really learned much from France's performance on the weekend, but what we learnt from Ireland is that without O'Driscoll the midfield defence is liable to be punctured at any moment. Ireland have a terrible record on French soil, and I think weakness in the centres, along with the blow of today's defeat, tots up to a French victory.
Wales over Scotland- This fixture two years ago provided one of the best matches I've ever seen and on of the biggest sucker-punches I've ever felt. If Scotland could replicate their performance from that game, minus the last ten minutes, then the impotent performance against the English will be partially atoned for. Wales look impressive though. Up front they're solid, if a bit shaky in the lineout, and their backs play with an impressive mix of pace and force. A win in this could set up a cracking encounter at Twickenham in Week 3 between two unbeatens.
Musical Outro: So this Lana Del Rey. She may not be the self-made, self-financed, album recorded in her bedroom, video made on her laptop, story to make a hipster muso wet themselves. Her performance on Saturday Night Live was pretty awful, the majority of her album is pretty mundane, and her lips look like they've been fiddled with on photoshop. But... I really like this song:
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